BOULDER, Colorado – After first laying to rest the 10-year mystery of who killed JonBenet Ramsey, another stunning admission came Friday from John Mark Karr in Bangkok, Thailand - that he killed President John F. Kennedy."I loved JFK. It was an accident," Karr told a rabid mob of hungry flesh eating jackals assembled by the local police for the occasion.
Boulder police were also quick to act, handing down indictments by breakfast. According to several sources within the investigation, the police have obtained evidence from chat room conversations between Karr and Senator Edward Kennedy where Karr confessed to have "...killed your brother. I was there when he died."
Citing rules she "remembers reading at law school" and the ongoing investigation, Boulder District Attorney Mary Lacy declined to discuss what evidence, other than Karr's post-arrest admissions and the fact he is "clearly a sick fuck" linked him to the 6-year-old beauty queen or the Kennedy assassination.In related news, Karr has gone through two stylists due to "creative differences" since his arrest.
Jello Biafra was unavailable for comment.
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3 comments:
I understand he also shot the sherrif - but he did not kill the deputy
They should send the Boulder Police to Iraq. They are bad-asses.
he's diabolical old chum...
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