Bush to NAACP: "Some Of My Best Soldiers Are Black!"

WASHINGTON – In his first speech to the NAACP after a five-year boycott of the civil rights group, President Bush boasted that "some of my best soldiers are black."

"I tell our recruiters to seek out black folks out for our military," said Bush. "I want them on the front lines in Iraq. If that's not having faith in America's African Americans, I don't know what is!"

As the audience sat in stunned silence, NAACP official Benjamin Hooks told the AFG that "this is very awkward."

"When it comes to dismantling roadside bombs, I tell the commanders to send the colored troops out to do that," boasted Bush. "I have no problem with quotas when it comes to this.....these brownies are doin' a heck of a job!"

When asked by reporters what other positions Bush endorses for Afrcian Americans, he responded that he found that "...they make great bartenders too. Plus they can sing up a storm. Like a hurricane. Actually, um, scratch that comparison"

The Rev. Jesse Jackson told AFG he attempted to give the President some advice before Bush took the stage, suggesting he "try not to say anything stupid."

Sources indicate that advice fell on deaf ears.